


More than Friends

by Dawnmoon76



Series: LGBTQ+ Moments (multifandom) [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Aromantic, Aromantic Asexual Sherlock Holmes, Asexual Character, Asexual Sherlock, Asexual Sherlock Holmes/Heterosexual John Watson, Greg Lestrade & Sherlock Holmes Friendship, Greg helps, He doesn’t know how to deal, M/M, Maybe - Freeform, Sherlock Holmes Has Feelings, but he figures it out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-27
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-22 11:21:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13165869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dawnmoon76/pseuds/Dawnmoon76
Summary: Sherlock can’t figure out his feelings towards a certain ex-army doctor. Eventually he does.ORThe one where the teenager helps with their new fangled “tumblr words”.





	More than Friends

“I’m pretty sure there are methods more effective in burning holes into things than your stare.”

Sherlock blinked back to attention. He hadn’t realized he had been staring...or rather glaring, at the side of John’s head. He had never felt this way about someone before yet, he couldn’t put a finger on what exactly he was feeling.

“Are you okay?”

Sherlock scowled at his loss of focus again. “I’m fine.” He accidentally snapped, wincing internally. But John, bless him, took it in stride, he hummed an ‘okay’, and went back to the newspaper. Sherlock went back to thinking, careful to scowl at the floor instead of his flatmate’s head.

He knew he was asexual since he was fifteen. He knew he still felt romantic attraction when he was seventeen with Victor. That relationship hadn’t lasted long when Victor realized he would never warm up to sex. But whatever he was feeling now perplexed him. John Watson was a brilliant mystery from the first day. A seemingly plain looking man but there was something intriguing about him. Sherlock couldn’t put a finger on it.

He wanted the closeness that he had with Victor but with John but...not. He didn’t want the dates, he didn’t want John as a boyfriend but John wasn’t just a friend. He was some sort of mixture of the two and it was driving Sherlock crazy. He wanted to bring his thoughts up with someone, but John was the only one he felt safe and comfortable enough with to talk to about...feelings.

“Okay, something is up. You’re not just in your Mind Palace. You’re staring a hole into the floor. Something is bothering you, what’s going on?” John didn’t seem upset by his sour demeanor, if anything, he seemed concerned.

He couldn’t not say anything. But he didn’t know how to put words to his emotions.

“Come on Sherlock, what’s bugging you?” John moved from his armchair to sit on the table in front of the couch. Sherlock kept his head down, staring at his clasped hands, thinking about the words he wanted to say then thinking about all the reasons he shouldn’t. “Sherlock.” The gentle call of his name was accompanied by a light hand on his knee.

“Feelings.” It wasn’t said with the usual contempt but with underlying frustration.

“What kind of feelings?” How did he get so lucky as to end up with John Watson? John didn’t dismiss him. Didn’t belittle him for not understanding something considered so basic. He genuinely wanted to help.

“I–I don’t...know.” The last word emphasized in his desperation to understand.

“Okay, okay.” John’s voice stayed calming and level. “Are they good feelings?” Sherlock knew with every fiber of his being that, yes, whatever it was, it was positive. He nodded. “Are they toward another person?” _You_. He nodded. “Hm, are they romantic?” Sherlock froze. That was the question he had been asking himself for a long time now. Was it romantic? What did he consider romance? It was a feeling not actions. But why was he feeling this semi-romantic feeling toward John? Why was the other half that of friends? Did he or did he not want a romantic relationship with John? _No_. Then why the confusion? _Because he’s also not just a friend._

“I don’t _know_.” His hands tightened on one another. “I don’t know, John. I’ve been thinking and thinking but I can’t figure it out.”

“Hey, it’s alright.” John wiggled a hand between Sherlock’s and held onto the left one, the hand on his knee moving to trap it between them. Sherlock’s free right hand curled around John’s wrist. “We’ll figure it out, yeah?”

The detective nodded. The room felt too small and John was too close but not close enough. He felt warm. “I need to–to go out.”

“Want me to come with you?”

“No. No, thank you.” Sherlock rose, unwilling to let go of John’s hands but had to move to get his coat. There was a reassuring pressure, he wasn’t sure who started it, then he let go. John moved in the same direction, trailing a brief hand across his shoulder blades before moving past him and up to his own room. Sherlock had put on his scarf and just let out a breath when John came back.

“Here, you’re distracted. Be careful.” He handed Sherlock his gun. It might have been a bit extreme but Sherlock was acting off. If someone got the jump on him he’d at least have the gun.

“Thank you.” He tucked the gun into his waistband, covered by his Belstaff. The a beat before Sherlock took off. After he shut the door he started an almost punishing pace, speed walking down the street.

He needed someone to talk to. He wished he could talk to John but John was a part of the problem...no, situation. This was far from a problem. Definitely not his brother. Mycroft would sneer and tell him to lock up these feelings. Tell him they were useless and just carry on like usual. Mrs. Hudson would probably coo over him. Express sympathy but ultimately be useless in sorting it all out. That only really left one other person. The person he was reluctant to claim as a father figure. Lestrade.

He turned at the next street, planning on heading over to Lestrade’s place. It would take some time to get there on foot but he needed the time to think. He decided to compare his feelings. John to different people.

Molly was a friend and comparable to John. But Molly was just that, a friend. He felt nothing stronger. John was a friend but...more.

Lestrade was both a friend and a sort of caring father figure. John was a friend and he was caring. However, Lestrade was too parental to compare.

He dismissed Sally and Anderson, the only thing there was the type of relationship developed after working together for a long time. A sort of professional thing.

He reluctantly thought of Mycroft. And very quietly, in his own mind, admitted the brotherly feelings he held. He loved Mycroft and it was probably the closest comparison to John. But...John wasn’t so...familial.

Victor...thinking back, he wasn’t so sure what he felt for him was romantic. It was definitely a romantic relationship but he was never truly comfortable in it. Did that mean he was aromantic too? He supposed if you took away the romantic context Victor fell more closely to Molly than John.

His feet stopped moving and it took a moment to realize he stood in front of his destination. He knocked on the door before belatedly realizing how late it was. It was closing in on eleven, he hoped Lestrade was still awake. He wasn’t sure he would be able to face John again without having himself sorted out.

“Sherlock?” Lestrade looked at the man before him. He couldn’t think of a better word than droopy. Sherlock’s shoulders were hunched and he looked a good few centimeters shorter. He looked so frustrated and vaguely angry. “Come in.” He opened the door wider wondering why Sherlock was there and why he looked the way he did. Greg saw that Sherlock drifted to the couch before going to the kitchen to make tea for the man. Luckily there was still warm water in the kettle from Lucy. He hoped she didn’t mind that he gave her second cup to ‘Uncle ‘Lock’. “Here you go.”

“Thank you.”

“What’s wrong?” He saw Sherlock’s fingers flex against the mug.

“I’m having a difficult time discerning my feelings.” His thumb starting stroking the side of the mug. Sherlock seemed tired, like he had been thinking on this for a long time.

“And you want help figuring them out?” Sherlock nodded. “Okay, try to describe them to me.”

Sherlock took a steadying breath. “It’s about John. I think–I feel like he’s something more of a friend. But yet...somehow less than a romantic interest? I don’t know...how else to put it.” Greg was struck when Sherlock finally looked up at him. He was so lost, so desperate for answers.

“Do you want to date him?”

“No, nothing of the sort. I know I don’t want that with him. I don’t want him as a boyfriend. But he’s more than a friend.” Sherlock hated how much of a broken record he sounded.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but perhaps what you’re feeling is something people in a queerplatontic relationship feel.” Lucy stood in the doorway, empty mug in hand. She came to perch on the couch arm closest to Sherlock.

“A what?” Sherlock asked, eyes focused on his adopted niece.

“Exactly what you’re feeling. It’s a non-romantic relationship between two or more people. Something that’s stronger than friendship but not a romantic relationship.” The teen explained. “Here, I’ll send you a link that might be helpful.” She pulled her phone from the waistband of her pajama bottoms, setting her mug down on the coffee table. A few seconds later Sherlock’s phone went off.

“Thank you.” He pulled out his phone and followed the link, tea forgotten on the table.

“You’re welcome, Uncle ‘Lock. Good luck.” She gave him a brief hug before heading to the kitchen. Greg heard her rinse out her mug and probably the kettle too. He turned back to Sherlock to see him engrossed in his phone. His eyes darted quickly over the webpage.

“Yes, yes!” He whispered excitedly. “Yes!” He exclaimed louder. Jumping up and pulling Lucy into a hug as she came out of the kitchen. She looked a little stunned at the sudden affection from her normally physically reserved uncle. “You’re brilliant!” He landed a theatrical kiss to her forehead before darting out the door.

“Glad I could be of service.” She said to the air. She walked around the couch and picked up Sherlock’s mug. She looked into it before shrugging and drinking from it. “‘Night Dad.” Before she headed back to her room scrolling through her phone. Greg wondered if she realized the magnitude of what she just did for Sherlock.

John tried to continue to read but was worried about Sherlock. He seemed so frustrated. He hated it when Sherlock was upset. He glanced at his watch, it was nearing midnight. He’d been gone for a little over an hour.

It was then that he heard the door open, he winced and hoped that Mrs. Hudson hadn’t been woken up.

“John! John!” Sherlock stopped breathlessly in the doorway. “I figured it out!” John saw Sherlock smile before he was engulfed in a hug. He quickly responded, hugging Sherlock back tightly. He could practically feel the detective’s excitement. “Look!” He would have fallen back if Sherlock hadn’t been holding onto his shoulders. Sherlock’s right hand disappeared into his coat and pulled out his phone, unlocking it and presenting it to John. He took it from the vibrating detective.

_A queerplatonic relationship (or "QPR") is one which is more intense and intimate than what most people regard as a friendship, not fitting the traditional romantic couple model. It is characterized by a strong bond, love, and emotional commitment, yet is not perceived by those involved as romantic or more than a friendship....The people involved do not have to identify as "queer", it is a type of relationship experienced by and available to anybody regardless of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation, or (non-)monogamy._

John’s eyes widened as he read. A hot flash of something went through him. Who could have gotten this attention from Sherlock? It was then that he realized he was _jealous_. He swallowed it.

“Who’s...who’s the lucky person?” He kept his eyes on the phone, pretending to continue to read. He looked up when he registered the sudden lack of excited bouncing.

“ _You_.” Sherlock breathed tenderly.

John’s eyes lit up. This was it. This was the name of the thing he was feeling. The feeling he had contented himself to call friendship.

Sherlock surged forward when he saw the light in John’s eyes. He hugged the man again. Ecstatic that John felt the same.

It was some time later that they started to actually talk. As they had took the time just to hug and cuddle after the realization.

“So what would I call you? You’re not my boyfriend but friend just doesn’t have the right connotation and I refuse to call you a zucchini.” John asked, referring to the part of the article that said aromantic asexuals jokingly coined the term to point out the lack of wording for that type of relationship.

Sherlock hummed. “Partner?”

John thought about. It could mean business partners, or it could mean romantic partners. The two were such opposites. He decided that partners would work the best. Just let strangers assume. And it’s not like they had many friends to clarify to. “Yeah, I like it, partner.” It made both men giggle happily. It was real, it was said out loud. It was a _thing_. “So how did you finally figure it out?”

“Lucy. I went over to talk to Lestrade and Lucy overheard. She suggested queerplatonic.” Sherlock paused for a moment. “Perhaps we should say quasiplatontic since you are straight and not in the queer community. There’s a lot of controversy in reclaiming the slur.”

“I’m glad she was able to help. And yeah, quasiplatontic might be better.”

Sherlock hummed again in contentment. He was tangled with John, _his partner_ , and turned his attention back to the television. He nuzzled John’s temple before dropping his head onto his shoulder. Letting the warmth of John’s presence lull him to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry that it might’ve not been very exciting or interesting to read. But it was a way to figure out my own feelings. I started the first part while trying to figure out what I was feeling for this girl. I finished it after we talked about it and I found out she felt the same!
> 
> Lucy is Greg’s daughter. You might know her from “Bombs, Music, Lucy and ‘Lock-down”. It’s not necessrily the same universe but you can look at it like that. In this she’s about sixteen/seventeen. 
> 
> Here’s the website that I quoted: http://aromantic.wikia.com/wiki/Queerplatonic
> 
> Lemme know if you have any ideas connected to this! Future moments, thanking Lucy, explaining to a person/people, etc. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
